This way you are kinder to yourself

If you expect a lot from yourself, it helps to take yourself less seriously and live lighter. To be kinder to yourself. You then feel 'easier' how you are doing, so that you know what you need and do what is good for you.

Who says you have to do it all?

By this I mean for example: lighter instead of heavy or giving more energy givers space than energy drainers. Because who says that you have to do all that? You can easily share, divide or do less of those drainers. You don't have to let go right away, because that feels too big. So you keep that light by doing them less, that's enough. Reducing step by step also sounds easier than letting go all at once. And when you are ready, you let go.

Embrace your soft power

You can also look at a lighter life from the light of yourself. Your strength that you may not always show, because you feel that this scares people. Or that you use for others, but not for yourself. You have always been there for others and have cared for them and cherished them. Now it is time to give this to yourself and to take good care of yourself and cherish yourself. You are ready for it, you feel that this change may come. Especially now, because you need it. Embrace your soft strength.

Nadia's story: from exhausted to recharged

An example: a while ago I coached Nadia who was always so tired and wondered what was wrong with her. “When I come home from work, I don’t have the energy or desire to do anything with my children. I feel like a bad mother, because I think my girls need me during puberty. But I just can’t bring myself to do it and that makes me so sad”. During the conversations in the fresh air, it soon becomes clear that Nadia is a very sensitive woman. She works in healthcare, four days a week and is always busy with people. That is also what she wants, that is where her passion lies, her heart. But it also exhausts her, because she feels everything. She immediately sees how someone is really doing and that is where she puts her energy. She gives everything away; her energy, love and time. And because of that, there is nothing left for her family and herself. The strength she feels at the beginning of the day is gone by the end. Step by step, during the coaching, she learned how to distribute her sensitivity and strength more over the day. And also keep it to herself by checking in with herself more often, breathing calmly and asking herself how she is doing. She is kinder to herself and that makes her work feel lighter. Now she can still give and receive enough love and time to her teenage girls at home.   

What are you willing to let go of for a lighter life?

The question for you: What do you want to reduce or show of yourself, so that life feels lighter for you?

Tip : Start your day with a breathing exercise in the morning: 10x deep in through your nose (your belly bulges) and out through the mouth (your belly pulls in). Your breath is a great source of energy and if you use it every morning, you will feel charged, more powerful and lighter.

Make conscious breathing a daily ritual

If you link the breathing exercise to a ritual you already have in the morning - for example your breakfast - then it is easier to fit such an exercise into your day and to keep it up. You also immediately set a positive intention for the day.

If you want to read more about this and get to know yourself better, read on in the PosiYou InspirationDoBook . This blog comes from chapter 3 'Be kind to yourself', in which you learn about meeting yourself and taking yourself less seriously, so that you live lighter.

The author: Yura Boerma

Yura from Happlify crew member PosiYou is one of the first coaches to join Happlify. It is the go-to if you are looking for more control over your life. Yura's blog posts >